We all had a good -- albeit melancholy -- laugh in 2006 when Saturday Night Live looked at a parallel universe where Al Gore was president (and where George W. Bush was baseball’s commissioner). The Gore administration was attacking global warming head on, but it turns out that global warming was fighting back.

Parallel-universe President Gore -- it feels great to write that, by the way -- told us: “In the last six years, we have been able to stop global warming. No one could have predicted the negative results of this. Glaciers that once were melting are now on the attack. As you know, these renegade glaciers have already captured parts of upper Michigan and northern Maine, but I assure you, we will not let the glaciers win.”

Turns out our shoulda-been president was onto something. Last week, the European Commission put out a report talking about the security risks climate change will pose in the coming decades, and that its members better arm up if they want to be safe from renegade glaciers and the millions of poor refugees they’re sure to create.

Here’s a few of the "highlights":

• "Unmitigated climate change beyond 2ºC will lead to unprecedented security scenarios as it is likely to trigger a number of tipping points that would lead to further accelerated, irreversible and largely unpredictable climate changes."

• "A drop in agricultural productivity will lead to, or worsen, food-insecurity in least developed countries and an unsustainable increase in food prices across the board. Water shortage in particular has the potential to cause civil unrest and to lead to significant economic losses, even in robust economies."

• "Receding coastlines and submergence of large areas could result in loss of territory, including entire countries such as small island states. More disputes over land and maritime borders and other territorial rights are likely. There might be a need to revisit existing rules of international law, particularly the Law of the Sea, as regards the resolution of territorial and border disputes."

• "Possible actions that could be developed include…Further build up EU and Member State planning and capabilities including civil protection and the use of crisis management and disaster response instruments (civil and military) to contribute to the response to the security risks posed by climate change."

Revisiting the Law of the Sea? Really? That sounds like something only the Bush Administration could come up with. You’re doing a heck of a job, Europe.